A Tale of Two Poufs

Because I’m supposed to be writing a statement of my teaching philosophy (whatever that actually is …) for job applications, I shall blog.  That’s writing, isn’t it?  Sure.

Back in October, my cousin Lauren and I were shopping for groceries and necessities at Walmart.  I have been sharing an apartment with my cousins Preston and Lauren down in Youngstown this school year.  It’s been great to have other people around – I’ve discovered that while I am ok with living by myself, I don’t prefer it.

Anyway.  Lauren and I found ourselves over by the shampoo aisle and suddenly (quite independently) remembered that we had wanted to get bath poufs (you know, those tulle spheres on a string?).  The fact that we were standing right in front of a bin of bath poufs might have had something to do with this revelation.  It took a few minutes of female decision making, but Lauren decided on a pink pouf and I claimed a green pouf.  I have this thing for lime green and aqua.  We were both happy with our colors and hung them in the shower with pride.

Fast forward a few weeks.  One morning, I realized that my green pouf was sitting on the little shelf in the shower – the string had come undone and it couldn’t be hung up anymore.  Oh well, the rest of the pouf was still intact; what can you expect from a $2.00 item?  Lauren’s pink pouf still hung with its string in a fully functional loop.  I didn’t think much of it and resumed regular use of the green pouf.  At dinner a few days later, Lauren and I were talking about going back to the grocery store.  Grocery shopping is our nemesis – we put it off as long as possible.  But there were a few staple items that we needed so a trip was in order. 

“Oh, and I need to get another pouf,” I recalled. “The string on mine broke about a week ago.  So cheaply made!”

“I know!” Lauren replied. “The string on mine broke a couple of days ago, too – I have to store it on the shelf in the shower since it can’t be hung up anymore.”

Hmm.  I mentally pictured the shower.  There definitely was only one pouf that had a broken string.  It was the green pouf.  Ah yes, that awkward moment when you realize that you and your cousin have been using the same green pouf for about a week.

That night, I bought a purple pouf.

If we played a different game of charades …

You put your hand in the bag and let your fingers dart around, chasing the little slips of paper. Got one! Whoops, no – that’s two. You awkwardly try and flick your fingers to separate the stubborn folded strips, hoping to avoid a paper cut in the process. One strip of paper finally gives up and lets go of the one you want. Finally! You withdraw your hand and glance at the name you just retrieved: Samson.


How do you act out Samson in a game of Bible charades? Well, you’re resourceful and imaginative. Most of the well-known people from the Bible are associated with a particular story or description of their character. Samson was strong. Zacchaeus was short. Mary Magdalene washed Jesus’ feet. Moses was used in the parting of the Red Sea. Deborah was a judge. Jonah ran from God. The list goes on.


And then you stop and think. What if we put my name and your name and the names of everyone we know on slips of paper … and had to act out each other?


Would I be known for being a gossip?
For being an encourager?
For being too sarcastic?
For being a person who prays?
For always being angry or crabby?
For being ready to serve others?
For being a procrastinator?
For always being happy?
For having an attitude?
For being a good friend?
For being proud and stuck up?
For reading the Word of God?


Would a friend act out someone entirely different than the side of me that my family sees?


I Timothy 4:12 “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”


Whether I like it or not, people have impressions of me. I am known by my character. You are known by your character. We are associated with the characters of those that we hang around. Does my character reflect the love of Christ within me?


We are quick to jump on the “We shouldn’t judge people!” and “Don’t judge me!” bandwagon. True. I’m not saying that we should judge each other. But – if someone was put on the spot for a description of my character, what could they say? We each have a reputation. Even a child is known by their doings.


And you know what? Everybody guessed Samson – right away!

It was time for a little walk down memory lane ...

It was January of last year.  

I was sitting on campus in the undergraduate math lounge (back when it was in Cushwa Hall) since I was going to tutor after student teaching.  My Mom was still a student in the nursing program at YSU, as well, and was studying in the atrium of Cushwa.  There was a bunch of people in the math lounge that must have been waiting for a 5:10pm class.  I sat down at the computer to work on lesson plans. 

So, this random never-seen-this-guy before middle-aged African man pops into the math lounge and asks where he could find one of the African grad students.  I didn’t recognize the name, so I sent him down to the grad office.  Ok, no sweat off my back.  So everybody leaves the lounge for class and it’s now 5:15pm on a Wednesday evening.  It’s nice and quiet.

Suddenly, that guy is back.

Ok, only slightly weirded out.  He has an African accent and speaks ever so softly – but incessantly.  He told me that he was so thankful for my directions and needed to tell me that … but that he was also lonely and didn’t have any friends (throwing in a few Christian jargon terms along the way).  Bottom line?  He wondered if he could be my friend. 

Hmm, weird, but I’m like “Uh, I guess. I’m Moriah.”

He then proceeded to pull stuff out of his briefcase and tell me his life story of escaping from the Congo when war broke out, how he is an engineer and makes $100K a year (but is going back to school in order to get a promotion to earn $150K-200K a year), shows me his resume and cover letter … then pulled out his transcript request receipts and handed me a business card.

By this time, I’m very confused.

Then.  Then he asks me if I’m married (ah! wished I was at that point) but I said “Umm, not yet.”  I didn’t realize that when he asked if we could “be friends”, that meant “can we be boyfriend and girlfriend?” 

He goes on to tell me that when he saw me his heart “just lept” and he knows that “his blood and my blood will mix positively” and there’s just “so much there”.  Whaaaa?

So, I text my Mom, “I need you to come to the lounge.” 

No reply.

In desperation, I finally get a word in edgewise, “Woah Nellie, I don’t understand what you’re getting at – I’m not available!” (Which, at the time, was true.)  He then proceeds to tell me that he understands that but that we can work through all of this as we “progress deeper into our relationship”.  Oiy. Talk about not taking a hint.

Let’s try a more direct approach.  “You don’t understand, I am in a relationship and am not available!” I tell him.  He still insists that it’s ok but that I should not close the door on him and must always think positively.  He assured me that he understands that it would take time to break up with the other guy.  

Ok, he gets ‘persistence points’ and scores double in the ‘creepy points’ category.

Meanwhile, I text Mom again.  It needs to be more pointed.  “Mom. A guy is proposing to me.”  This guy is between me and the door, I can’t just walk out.

He still doesn’t take the blatant hint and proceeds to give me his personal phone number and email address … and then asks for mine.  I emphatically reply that I don’t give that out to *strangers*.  He assures me that he knows that he and I are meant to be together because his knees got weak and pained when he left to find his friend (great, glad to know that I can cause arthritis).  He had to come back and take a chance to express his feelings.

By this time, I’m in major African dude freak out.  Oh, I manage to gather (from his resume) that he was born in 1961.  He is almost as old as my Dad.

Enter Mom, stage left!  Honestly – who has their Mom in their hip pocket on a secular college campus that they can pull out whenever they need her?  I do. 

“Leonard, I would like you to meet … my Mom.”

His face emanates a stunned look as he frantically starts packing up his portfolio of credentials.  Mom is very polite but looks at me and asks, “Do you know Leonard?” 

“No!”

“Ok, well, Leonard, you have to go now.  Bye.”

Exit Leonard, stage right.

In all honesty, I think someone was in desperate need of a green card.  The moral of the story?  Guys, you seriously need to start all relationships with transcript request receipts.  There is nothing more sincere, romantic, and sends a solid message about one’s character as transcript request receipts (“Well, I’ve finished my one degree and am looking to the future! Here’s a signed testament to that on the pink copy of the 3-ply carbon set”). 

Words to live by.  Or laugh by!  

It was a cold and sunny morning ...

The sun was huge this morning. I love early mornings. The coolness, the quiet, the frost, the mist, and being able to actually see the sun's "rays". I love having to drive east to get to school in the mornings. I love that I pass through some wooded rural-looking areas and end up in the city with some sky-scraper-wanna-be's that are silhouetted by the sun's rays. I love that it only takes 13 minutes to drive to school. I love the thought of being up early and having the whole day ahead. I love that God made the sun rise today. (Ok smarty-pants, I know that the sun didn't "rise" ... the earth turned ... but it's less cool to say "it was a lovely earth turn this morning!")

In short, I love being up early. Let it be noted ... I do not like *getting up*. But being up? It's my favorite. Ah, there's nothing like early morning.

What's your favorite time of day?

It was a dark and stormy night ...

... no, actually, it is a dark and stormy night. I wasn't kidding ... at this point, I would include a smiley emoticon, but I tend to overuse those ... so just mentally picture a grin. I am quite pleased with myself for actually writing right now.

As I sit here ... I realize that I have approximately 4 topics that I wish I could organize my thoughts fast enough to put them into words before the thought disappears. Even as of this moment, I'm not sure which topic will actually make it below ...

A couple of weeks ago, I visited a church near school since I stayed the weekend rather than going home. [In case you're wondering - it was a good church - somewhere I would consider going regularly if I didn't already have a home church.] In the little visitor's bag of goodies I was given, there was a paperback copy of RC Sproul's "The Holiness of God". Now, I cannot claim to know anything about this author, but I have enjoyed reading this book thus far (not finished, I can't devour this like I can a novel!). As suggested by the title, Sproul is writing on the holiness of God. A few things that impressed me to think more on ...

Oftentimes, I find myself using words which "fit in context", but I have a hard time actually defining ... holiness is one of those words. I admit, I most often mentally equate the word "holy" with "purity". Indeed, those are related ... purity is contained within the idea of holy (being the math person that I am, it thrilled me that I could use a Venn diagram to visualize this idea! Ok, enough with the math already ...). However, the primary meaning of "holy" is simply "separate", or "set apart". Now, maybe you already knew that ... I think I already knew that ... but ... in the miraculous realization that only God can open, my eyes and heart were opened to realize this in a new way. It's hard for me to explain, but just re-realizing this adds a new dimension to the passages as I read.

(Hmm, apparently, that is all I had to say on that. Short but significant ... to me ...)

A rather "hot topic" right now is the whole topic of "judging" one another. While I don't really care to delve into that whole realm right now (debating and arguing just isn't something I enjoy. I have strong opinions and convictions, but it often doesn't seem productive to enter in those conversations.) Anyway. Hypocrisy is one of the major sticking points when it comes to pointing fingers in "judging". How can you point at the mote in my eye when you have a beam in your own?! Or, at least, that seems to be the general approach. It always has seemed hypocritical (even if it is just my own warped perception) that a human can preach holy living.

To quote from Sproul's book, "All preachers are vulnerable to the charge of hypocrisy. In fact, the more liable they are to the charge of hypocrisy. Why? Because the more faithful people are to the Word of God, the higher the message is that they will preach. The higher the message, the further they will be from obeying it themselves."

Yikes. It is really one-sided and hard-headed to block out God's Word and teaching because it is being presented by a fallible human. It seems impossible to walk a perfect life. That doesn't mean, however, that we shouldn't strive for walking even as He walked (I John 2:6). The more God reveals Himself to us, the more we realize just how impossible it is for us to be as God and so desperately needed Christ.

Now, this, I have a math analogy for ... I have taken a lot of math classes. To those outside of the field, higher-level math often simply means "calculus". Yes, I have taken calculus ... a long time ago. There is no Calculus 13 that I know of (picture the "grin" again) ... After calculus, we take courses such as linear algebra, differential equations, numerical analysis, statistics, topology, abstract algebra, euclidean transformations, real analysis ... you get the gist. I used to be good at math (or, so I thought). But now? Oiy. The more math classes I've taken, the more I realize just how dumb and mediocre I am. All this has shown me is just how little I know. In the grand scheme of things, I'm not even a little fish in a big pond - I'm not even sure if I make amoeba size!

How was that an analogy?! Oh right. Back to preachers preaching holiness. The more that one gets a glimpse of the holiness of God, the more they realize that they are an amoebic sinner that is only saved by God's grace. (This is not to say that there is not hypocrisy among preachers or Christians. It's a sad reality sometimes, but not that it is or should be assumed to be the norm.) It seems proud to realize one's humility. God knows the heart, however. It always baffled me that the Old Testament prophets would cry "Woe is me!" and announce just how wretched of a sinner they were. Goodness, from what I could tell, they hardly seemed wretched. But, that is me comparing myself to them. They saw themselves against the holiness of God - and it shook them to the core.

See, this is where I fail as a writer. At this point, I'm like, "Ok, I'm done now. Submit, QED." Yes, QED is how we end math proofs ... it is short for the Latin "quod erat demonstrandum" which means "which was to be demonstrated". Made my point, time to check out. But ... I don't know if I've made my point. I've sort of just rambled. (Do I even have a point?!) Trying to articulate what God has been working on in my life and showing me is hard for me to do. My mind is a pinball machine sometime (please picture the little ideas getting hit off of each other and going "boing! boing!").

Regrouping ...

I am thankful for what God has been doing and the way that He has been using scripture, people, sermons (yay internet!), books, and life in general to light a spark under myself and to not be lukewarm. In short, I Peter 1:15 has been my challenge, "But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear.." Exactly what is my answer to that?

Apparently, I have the urge to write and label every post on a "dark and rainy night". Good thing an Ohio winter is on its way! :) Gah. An emoticon. I couldn't resist. ;)

It was a dark and rainy night ...

... and then I had the whim to make a blog.

It's one of those things that I never thought I would do given my extreme aversion to writing. However, there are lots of musings going on in my head right now ... what better place to put them then on a little plot of internet that no one has to even know about ... and call it a blog?

My numerical analysis homework is sitting in front of me, begging me to finish this LU factorization of a 4 by 4 matrix. But it shall wait. There are more exciting distractions to appease at the moment ...

Please pardon my overuse of ellipses. Of all the punctuation invented by the English language, ellipses win first place in my heart ... they are the pause I take in real life. However, that could just be my lack of concentration when speaking ...

But I digress.

The real point of creating this blog is that God has been putting a lot of things on my heart lately that have prompted a search of His Word, discussions with others, prayer, organization of thoughts ... and the desire to write up a culmination of these musings.

A desire to write?! Bah. Say it isn't so ... No, really. I would love for discussions and input and ideas and scriptures and run-on sentences conjoined with conjunctives to encourage and (kindly ...) challenge me and you in the trek through this earth. As such, I will try and be short and sweet. No rambling! Concise, well-thought-out, and backed by the scriptures. That is the goal, at least.

I pray that the Lord will be able to use this as a blessing in my life ... and in yours, as well!

So, just as I type on the Best Buy display computers, "Thanks for the memories!"