... no, actually, it is a dark and stormy night. I wasn't kidding ... at this point, I would include a smiley emoticon, but I tend to overuse those ... so just mentally picture a grin. I am quite pleased with myself for actually writing right now.
A couple of weeks ago, I visited a church near school since I stayed the weekend rather than going home. [In case you're wondering - it was a good church - somewhere I would consider going regularly if I didn't already have a home church.] In the little visitor's bag of goodies I was given, there was a paperback copy of RC Sproul's "The Holiness of God". Now, I cannot claim to know anything about this author, but I have enjoyed reading this book thus far (not finished, I can't devour this like I can a novel!). As suggested by the title, Sproul is writing on the holiness of God. A few things that impressed me to think more on ...
Oftentimes, I find myself using words which "fit in context", but I have a hard time actually defining ... holiness is one of those words. I admit, I most often mentally equate the word "holy" with "purity". Indeed, those are related ... purity is contained within the idea of holy (being the math person that I am, it thrilled me that I could use a Venn diagram to visualize this idea! Ok, enough with the math already ...). However, the primary meaning of "holy" is simply "separate", or "set apart". Now, maybe you already knew that ... I think I already knew that ... but ... in the miraculous realization that only God can open, my eyes and heart were opened to realize this in a new way. It's hard for me to explain, but just re-realizing this adds a new dimension to the passages as I read.
(Hmm, apparently, that is all I had to say on that. Short but significant ... to me ...)
A rather "hot topic" right now is the whole topic of "judging" one another. While I don't really care to delve into that whole realm right now (debating and arguing just isn't something I enjoy. I have strong opinions and convictions, but it often doesn't seem productive to enter in those conversations.) Anyway. Hypocrisy is one of the major sticking points when it comes to pointing fingers in "judging". How can you point at the mote in my eye when you have a beam in your own?! Or, at least, that seems to be the general approach. It always has seemed hypocritical (even if it is just my own warped perception) that a human can preach holy living.
To quote from Sproul's book, "All preachers are vulnerable to the charge of hypocrisy. In fact, the more liable they are to the charge of hypocrisy. Why? Because the more faithful people are to the Word of God, the higher the message is that they will preach. The higher the message, the further they will be from obeying it themselves."
Yikes. It is really one-sided and hard-headed to block out God's Word and teaching because it is being presented by a fallible human. It seems impossible to walk a perfect life. That doesn't mean, however, that we shouldn't strive for walking even as He walked (I John 2:6). The more God reveals Himself to us, the more we realize just how impossible it is for us to be as God and so desperately needed Christ.
Now, this, I have a math analogy for ... I have taken a lot of math classes. To those outside of the field, higher-level math often simply means "calculus". Yes, I have taken calculus ... a long time ago. There is no Calculus 13 that I know of (picture the "grin" again) ... After calculus, we take courses such as linear algebra, differential equations, numerical analysis, statistics, topology, abstract algebra, euclidean transformations, real analysis ... you get the gist. I used to be good at math (or, so I thought). But now? Oiy. The more math classes I've taken, the more I realize just how dumb and mediocre I am. All this has shown me is just how little I know. In the grand scheme of things, I'm not even a little fish in a big pond - I'm not even sure if I make amoeba size!
How was that an analogy?! Oh right. Back to preachers preaching holiness. The more that one gets a glimpse of the holiness of God, the more they realize that they are an amoebic sinner that is only saved by God's grace. (This is not to say that there is not hypocrisy among preachers or Christians. It's a sad reality sometimes, but not that it is or should be assumed to be the norm.) It seems proud to realize one's humility. God knows the heart, however. It always baffled me that the Old Testament prophets would cry "Woe is me!" and announce just how wretched of a sinner they were. Goodness, from what I could tell, they hardly seemed wretched. But, that is me comparing myself to them. They saw themselves against the holiness of God - and it shook them to the core.
See, this is where I fail as a writer. At this point, I'm like, "Ok, I'm done now. Submit, QED." Yes, QED is how we end math proofs ... it is short for the Latin "quod erat demonstrandum" which means "which was to be demonstrated". Made my point, time to check out. But ... I don't know if I've made my point. I've sort of just rambled. (Do I even have a point?!) Trying to articulate what God has been working on in my life and showing me is hard for me to do. My mind is a pinball machine sometime (please picture the little ideas getting hit off of each other and going "boing! boing!").
Regrouping ...
I am thankful for what God has been doing and the way that He has been using scripture, people, sermons (yay internet!), books, and life in general to light a spark under myself and to not be lukewarm. In short, I Peter 1:15 has been my challenge, "But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear.." Exactly what is my answer to that?
Apparently, I have the urge to write and label every post on a "dark and rainy night". Good thing an Ohio winter is on its way! :) Gah. An emoticon. I couldn't resist. ;)
